She"ll Be Coming ‘Round the Corner

She”ll be coming round the corner when she comes. . .Ye haw!
When I will actually come around the corner, no body knows, but I must be approaching.
I want to get off my pity pot now, although I am sure I will revisit this friendly spot, it is getting old. I am fatigued by my fear. Fear has come to haunt me and pull at my heart; it’s nails dig in and pull against my chest, I feel it scraping. . .but I have to ignore the pull. If I give in to it, then I am no stronger than I was yesterday or one year ago, or two. If I give in, then I am not relying on my faith at all. How I want to crumble and fall into a heap in the corner. . .I would be fine there, really! It is okay to leave me there!
How about crawling under the covers. . .will you find me there? Oh wait, that is so predictable of me. . .okay. . .here is the deal: In less than 48 hours I will have completed my first obstacle in the “real world”. I will have awakened myself at an atrociously early hour and arrived at my first day of orientation for my new job. I will have spent 9 hours away from home and thinking of things mostly not related to home. I can expect that I will be quite tired and I will have one more day of orientation ahead. I think it will be then that I will have come around the corner, or nearing it at least.
This fear, this fear of going back into the working world is growing by the day and I am letting it have way too much space in my mind. I am focusing on it, as if it is the only thing going on and as if I am facing some kind of grueling form of torture, which is debatable, but most likely not defined as torture. I am straightening out my spine, holding my head high, and going to take something for my nausea. Just kidding, I am not actually going to take anything for my nausea, but I will be taking something for my anxiety, thank you very much.
I’ll let you know when I get around the corner.

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