I am blessed. . . a middle ground has emerged. I am beginning to feel better with a lot of help from a couple of different sources. I had a massage, and thought I was going to die the following day as my body was filled with toxins and poison. But I didn’t. And then I went to see a wonderful chiropractor yesterday and again today. I am experiencing more range of motion and less pain overall!
The most exciting part for me is that I am now able to continue forward with my plans to go to Chicago and participate as fully as I can in The Overnight! During the time when I felt that I might not be able to go, I was greatly discouraged. I was concerned about the people who had so kindly supported me and have been there with me through each peak and valley of my fundraising and awareness efforts. I did not want to disappoint them, and I still do not. Feeling that kind of discouragement and frustration is something that most with a chronic illness such as Fibromyalgia can relate to. As a friend of mine said to me today, “we must continue to make plans though, because if we don’t make plans then we have given up hope” and I agree completely. But it is so disappointing when we have to cancel or change those plans.
Often my friends or family experience a lot of frustration when I have to change plans because my body has decided to go on strike. Quite frequently what they don’t realize is that I am just as upset about the change. It is certainly inconvenient for others when I am not able to hold up my end and when I have to switch plans at last minute, it is inconvenient for all . . .
But I am just thankful that this time, it is working out for me to go, to hold up my end, although it may be a bit modified. I most likely will not be walking the entire length of the walk (18-20 miles!) . . . in fact I will probably have to go to the hotel and rest in the middle of the night in order to be a part of the ceremonies on each end of the walk, but this is part of the deal. If I am going to go forward, I can’t send my body backwards and remove all of the progress I have made in the last few days by over-doing. I have to respect my limits, even if it is hard to do so, even if it is uncomfortable and awkward. But onward I go . . . and I am truly blessed to be able to.
Each person that has offered help, support, donations, prayers and guidance through these past few weeks has a very special place in my heart and they are going to be with me for every part of this event. I can imagine the people that are far away, those not able to be there but would like to, hand in hand with me and so many others, as we move out of the darkness together.
If you would like to follow my adventure in Chicago and as I participate in the events surrounding and during The Out of the Darkness Overnight please follow me on twitter, my name on twitter is Abeeliever. I will be tweeting from the event and giving lots of updates! You can read more about why I am participating at http://tinyurl.com/nomoredark.