In a moment…

Suddenly I am completely over-whelmed. It came over me literally like a wave, but it lingers. I find myself quite often wanting to take on the world. I want to solve all of my family’s problems, take care of everything myself. Figure it all out. And, I would like everything to be just right, especially me.

Instead of thinking too much on the perfection and pressure that I put on myself I am going to lighten up a little on the blog tonight. I’m not going to worry too  much about the content, if I will get a lot of views or if whatever I am writing will work for my “audience” (if I even have one!).

I am having a mental health moment, giving myself a break. Breathing and breathing in acceptance. I’m not feeling it much from myself, but I know it’s out there for me. I actually have to stop and breathe… and admitting that I’m not feeling it is kind of emotional. It feels sad. The truth is though, that I am okay, just as I am in this moment. I am not perfect…but I am me, and I am especially me. Each of us are.

Thoughts of not measuring up, not being good enough, not having what it takes, are poking me in the ribs, the head and the gut today. I must shake it off, because they are lies. It’s really hard to tell the difference between the truth and the lies sometimes. Best way for me to determine if I am telling myself a lie… ask myself if my child was in my exact situation or state of being, would I love them less or feel like they are not worthy of my love? The answer, of coarse, is “no”. I love my children just for being them, regardless of achievements or skills, I just love them. Therefore, I too, am okay, am loved, just as I am…

I may not have someone to tell me every day just how wonderful they think I am, but I can tell myself and I can take a moment (or many more) to sit in the knowledge that I am amazing, just the way I am. (Gulp.) And guess what? You can do it, too.

 

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